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Candles
tomorrow will be 3 years since you left
not a day has been the same without you
I miss you all the time, you are always in my thoughts
and will always be in my heart until we are together again
Love Mum
Happy Birthday my darling Son
Know nothing is the same without you here with me
You are missed every day
Always in my thoughts always in my heart
Mum
On the eve of the year of your passing , I light this candle in remembrance of you Will. It’s still hard to believe your no longer here, rest easy my old friend. Until we meet again some day.
Hey you thank you for visiting me the other day. You couldn't have made it more clearer, that it was you and allowed me to take a picture to show the kids. I need you now more than ever, and I'm sorry. Maybe you came to me that day, to let me know that you are always there, and to open my eyes with things you have said to me, and tried to make me understand and believe, but I never truly listened or believed it until now. You were right on certain things, and it has opened my eyes, and made me realize allot of things, and it's very hard to process it all right now. Why is it happening this month, when already it's hard enough and depressing enough for us, and to add to it, I will never understand. It's not fair for them, these kids have been through hell and back these last 3 years, why add to it, what have they done? I'm trying so hard, everyday, with every ounce of strength I have to do right and trying to get their lives back to a normal as much as it can be. So why? This can't happen, you can't allow it. It's not about me whatsoever in this, it's about them and them only, but that doesn't seem to matter the impact it will have on them. But it shows and tells me allot, and I think that is what you wanted to show me. Please do whatever you can, help me whatever way you can, to protect and keep them safe and secure where they need to be, they need you now more then ever. I'll keep being strong like everyone tells me to be and everything will work out and be fine, easy for all to say when it's not them going through it all. We will get through this with your help and guidance, and pray to God this is not the next chapter of our lives, we have gone through enough now, enough is enough, we don't deserve this this. Please I beg you. We love and miss you everyday single day and keep watching over us. Xo
Happy Father's day xo Today is a tough day for the kids. They miss you so much. We noticed you have been around allot lately, in different ways. They notice it too, and makes them smile, thank you. Lots has been going on, but you are there to protect them, and do what you can, to help in your little ways. They have been talking allot about you, sometimes with tears, and sometimes with smiles, but you are never forgotten and always thought of.
Lots going on lately with your son. I know you are watching, from up above. I need you to somehow, someway help me out with all of this. You were his go-to when he was going through stuff. Give me a sign, something to guide me, or tell me I am doing okay and making the right decisions for him to get him through all of this because I know you would do some things differently. I wish he would get some help with losing you, but he is stubborn and bottling it up. He shared some things with me last week, and he misses you so much. God, how I wish I could take their pain away. Help me in any way you can, please.
Been on my mind, and having weird dreams. Kids have been doing good. Your name comes up everyday, by one of them. I got this weird email, and the persons name was William. He is a tarot card reader, astrologer wanting to give me a reading. Found it so weird he had the same name. Are you trying to tell me something? Kloe is doing well with her counseling, she has allot to get through, but slowly she will get there. Went to credit Valley last week, was hard, since the last time I went was to say goodbye to you. Got through it, but wasn't easy. Please continue to watch over us, and keep the kids safe. We miss you.
Hey you, it's been awhile since I wrote you. Doesn't matter though, I talk to you all the time, and I'm sure it's driving you crazy lol. The kids are doing well, they are doing virtual for the past 2 weeks, and it's going awesome. Connor has brought his marks up, and Kloe is getting her stuff and projects done. Very proud of them. Kloe got her 2nd vaccine yesterday, and I got my booster. I'm just happy she is done before going back to school. Kloe has been speaking about you allot lately. They both had a hard time with Christmas, but we got through it. Connor had an emotional moment, when he went and watched his first Marvel movie with out you. That was your thing the 2 of you, so it was hard for him, but all the firsts will be, and I do what I can and I'm there to help them through it. I tell them one day at a time. They miss you so much. I know you are watching down on them, and keeping them safe. We did the Christmas tree all in blue because it's your favorite color, and Kloe wanted to do it so badly. She won't let me take it down lol help me with that please lol the new year has been good so far, I'm getting myself back to the normal me, and get out of this funk and sadness. I can't change that you are no longer here, so I need to accept it, rightand move on. I have less drama now with cutting people out of my life, and it has brought me some peace. I'm doing what I need to for me and the kids and being happy and live life. We have allot of love and support, and true people in our corners, and the fake being tossed out slowly. Help guide me in the right direction. Ok enough for now. We miss you very much, we think of you all the time, and speak of you often. ❤
Hey,
Another week down. It was an interesting one, to say the least. I made a decision and I'm sticking to it. Last week you helped me learn some things and opened my eyes, to help make me understand why. That helped me out so much and now I can move on a little easier. My decision has caused a feud,but one that needed to be done. It has been hard, because it's hurting certain ppl and She is being nasty. I needed to get rid of the toxic, drama,stress,and not worth my time anymore out of our lives. I feel really good with this decision and I know its the right one to make. I know you are looking down, and smiling, because you are proud of me and want us happy and to move forward and start the new year in a positive direction and just be happy. Kloe had a breakdown tonight, she misses you and wants to see you again. We had a good cry together reading some of your messages to her. Connor is doing ok taking it day by day. Keep them safe and hug them tight. We miss you.
Hey you,
Sorry I have not messaged the last few times. Life always throws something my way to deal with. Still having a hard time, still want to believe it's all a dream. Thinking allot about Christmas, and you not physically being here with us. Kloe is doing good, still her crazy happy self. She is doing well at school, her report card was good. As for Connor, having a hard time with school, and other things. Trying my best to handle it the way you would. These are the moments I miss having you here the most, because you would be the one to handle these things with him. You had a way with him, he would listen and try to make it better. He is having anger issues, since you have left. Trying to figure the best way to take care of it somehow. He talks about you, and memories, things you taught him and so on. He really misses you. Going to get pictures of you and the kids developed and do up a wall with them all, so they can look at them and smile. Still going one day at a time. Some days are harder then others, but I pull through and stay strong for our kids. Keep protecting and watching over them.
Hey,
The kids are doing ok. I'm having a hard time with Connor and school. You always talked to him, and set him straight. Can you please work your magic, from up above for me. Kloe is doing good, school is good, and she is her happy self. They still talk about you all the time, and miss you so much. I had a rough week with the 2 mts of your passing. I still get so emotional and wish it was a dream. I got some news today, and I know you had something to do with it. Thank you for making it right. I know you watch us everyday, and that I'm not going to let you down with this. Thank you for finally having faith in me and know that I'm not going to make a mistake with it. The kids deserve this and it will help us enormously. Thank you. Keep the kids safe and always be around them and hold them tight.
Another week has gone by. The kids are doing well. I had a tough week, it was an emotional one. Tomorrow will be 2 months, and I still can't believe it is real. I'm stressing with some things, but you know me, I'll figure it out. Keep watching over the kids and keep them safe.
Another week has come and gone. We reminisced allot this week. Shared memories, looked at pictures. Saw so many pics I haven't seen before, it was nice. Going to get them developed for the kids. They miss you everyday, but know you are around them all the time. Hasn't got easier but take it day by day. Kloe got a test back the other day, and was so proud, and she said you would be proud as well. Connor is doing good also, but need to kick his but a bit with a few things. Good old teenage years. Feel free to give him a kick in the butt to help me out lol hope I'm making you proud so far, but I'm sure you would be a you know what about a couple things lol
This week has started off really hard. Please keep watching protecting them. I know you can see from up above what is happening right now. Please do what you can to make it right. The children depend on it.
Hey,
Our kids had some ups and downs this week. They both wish they could see you again. We 5alk about you all the time. I'm sure you hear our conversations. Still keep waking up, hoping it's all a dream. Hopefully one day it will stop, and reality sets in for us. Keep watching over them, holding them, keeping them safe. Say hi to your dad for me, we talk allot about him also.
Today is the day, we say "till we meet again" this is not goodbye. Connor is having a tough week. I'm so worried about Kloe, and how she will handle tonight. Please hold them both tight tonight, and make them feel safe, so that they know you are there with them, and will always be there in spirit. They miss you so much. I'm doing everything I can to be the best support system for them, I hope I'm making you proud. Still ask myself everyday, if this dream will ever end. Even though you are not here to help me with them, I know you are still there in the back of my head, or sending signals or vibes to help me. Just know and keep watching from above, that I promise I will do everything and anything for our kids.
The kids had a good week at school. Connor had a little bit of a breakdown, he misses you. Kloe well she has your sarcasm so we hear you in her everyday lol. Keep procuring them and keeping them safe.
The kids miss you. They have you with them, around their necks. They are loving school right now. Still surreal to me. Keep waking up thinking it's all a dream. They speak of you often with their memories. Kloe always has that smart, sarcastic answer just like her daddy. Keep watching over them, and keep them safe.
Will and I met through work. He was an amazing supervisor who taught me so much over the years. I was so saddened to hear that Will was sick and shocked to hear of his passing. He was definitely taken way too soon. I’ll miss you, and my condolences go out to the family. I am so sorry for your loss
38 years was not long enough to spend with you. I am just broken without you here
This is not goodbye it is only until we meet again I loved you son more than you ever knew
Mum
My heart goes out to your mom and sisters who have lost a dearly beloved son, brother, and best friend.
Words cannot explain how much you are loved and missed.
We shared so many precious memories that I will treasure forever.
Love and hugs. Auntie Lesley xox
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